Setting boundaries and saying no can feel daunting, especially if you're used to putting others' needs before your own. For many people who struggle with people pleasing, conflict avoidance, or prioritising others over themselves, it can feel exhausting and unfulfilling. People pleasing often becomes an automatic response, shaped by past experiences where being agreeable felt necessary for acceptance or safety.
You might find yourself agreeing to things you don't really want to do, avoiding conflict at all costs, or feeling guilty when you prioritise your own needs. Over time, this can lead to feeling resentful, overwhelmed, or unsure of who you really are. These patterns are not personal failings — they are often coping strategies developed from past situations where pleasing others felt essential to maintaining peace or gaining approval.
Struggling with boundaries and people pleasing often stems from past experiences, such as being conditioned to keep the peace, avoid conflict, or seek validation through being helpful. These patterns can become so ingrained that they feel automatic, leaving you feeling stretched thin and disconnected from your own needs.
These patterns are not signs of weakness. They often reflect a way of coping when feeling accepted or safe depended on keeping others happy. Therapy can help you learn to set boundaries with confidence and honour your own needs.
Therapy offers a safe, supportive space to explore why setting boundaries feels so challenging and how people pleasing became a pattern in your life. We will work together to understand the roots of these behaviours and how they continue to impact your relationships and well-being. Through a combination of psychoeducation, trauma processing, self-compassion practices, and mindfulness, you can learn to assert your needs without guilt and develop a healthier relationship with yourself and others.
During our sessions, we will focus on creating a space where you feel empowered to express your thoughts and feelings without judgment. You will learn to recognise the signs of people pleasing and understand why it feels so ingrained. The goal is to help you build healthy boundaries and a sense of self-worth that doesn't rely on pleasing others.
Learning to set boundaries and break free from people pleasing is a gradual process. It's natural to feel uncomfortable at first, and that's okay. In our work together, we will practise self-compassion — recognising that change takes time and that valuing your own needs is an act of self-respect. Allowing yourself to grow at your own pace is part of building confidence and self-worth.
If you're considering therapy, I'm here to support you. We can start with a free 15-minute consultation to see how you feel about working together. Taking that first step can feel daunting, but you don't have to carry the weight of it all on your own.
Book a Free ConsultationAvailable in Glasgow (Barrhead & Central Glasgow) and Online.
I like to write articles about how trauma can affect your thoughts, emotions, and relationships — and how therapy can gently support you to become yourself again.